Tuesday, April 02, 2013

Student Suspended For Intent to Murder…Fruit?

Student Suspended For Intent to Murder…Fruit?
A 13-year-old girl was suspended from school for a day at Wamsutta Middle School in Massachusetts because she brought a butter knife into her school.  With deadly intent, she brought the knife to cut up the pear packed in her lunch because she wears braces that prevent her from simply biting into the fruit.

By de Andréa
April 2, 2013

Morgan La Plaume, the fruit murdering student told WXFT-TV that the principal spotted a deadly weapon on the lunch table and hauled her malicious behind into his office.  She said, quote:  “As we were walking to his office the principal said you are not allowed to have knives in school, and I said I was using it to cut my pear, I wasn’t harming any other student, and he said ‘I know, but it’s the policy’,” said the potential criminal pixie-like teen age Morgan.

As the mothers of hardened criminals like Morgan often do, Morgan’s mom, Melissa LaPlaume made excuses for her little felon.  “It’s a butter knife, she has braces, there was no intent at all there,” La Plaume said.  An obvious lie and cover-up, the Gidget like little teen was caught bloody handed attempting to kill the defenseless fruit.

Yet she broke the rules of the State institution of robotic programming, which presumably does not provide plastic shives with school lunches or at least attempt to get around the rule by providing combination fork-knives, affectionately called “knorks.”  This is just the latest in what seems to be a rash of incidents where school officials have had to step in to stop students with murderous criminal intent.

For instance, there was the recent incident where a student on a school bus was thankfully suspended after preventing a football player with a loaded gun from shooting a teammate.  If he hadn’t been suspended, who knows what dastardly deeds the student might have moved on to commit — stopping a bank robbery or perhaps pulling someone from a burning car.  One just can’t be too careful.

Then there was the 7-year-old boy who chewed his toaster pastry into the shape of a gun (he said it was a mountain, but the teacher knew better, another obvious cover-up).  What a devilish mind to sneak a pastry-weapon past school metal detectors like that!

And let us not forget the school officials who locked down all the schools in a Pennsylvania county because a medical office worker calling a high school student to confirm an appointment heard on the child’s voicemail greeting, the phrase “shooting some people outside of the school” she heroically ratted the kid out to local police.  The voicemail message actually turned out to be the theme song from “Fresh Prince of Bel-Air,” and the lyrics actually said, “Shooting some Basket-Ball outside of the school,”  but let’s not muddy a tale of bravery and quick thinking with the truth.

This is a frightening trend across this country.  Children with easy access to stuff that adult nutty liberals suffering from paranoia find scary, are rampaging out of control creating a climate of fear.  Teachers should protect themselves from intruding pastry carrying 7 year olds by carrying canceled scissors like DHS recommends watch a training video from other nutty liberals.

THE BOTTOM LINE:  Something needs to be done, and it should of course follow the pattern of gun control efforts, which have historically been so successfully unsuccessful.  We need to start making our schools CHILD-FREE ZONES.  Kids need to be restricted and/or banned.  Not all kids of course, just certain ones, such as those who talk, chew gum, eat lunch, and wear braces, students who stand up for fellow students, use high-capacity pastry magazines, or who just wiggle around too much.

Kids are expendable, that’s why we don’t protect them with the same weapons that crazy liberals kill them with.  You see - the ones that make it as far as school’ are the ones that liberals missed exterminating anyway at the abortion clinics.

People who don’t want to keep kids out of school to protect other kids just don’t have a heart, and must be Nazis.  Owning a kid is like owning a gun, and as Dianne Feinstein so mindlessly pointed out, that’s like child pornography, which means all parents are perverts.  …  Maybe we should just ban people from giving birth.  Well…we already do that!

Of course, the Supreme Court, in all likelihood, is about to do that again with its forthcoming gay marriage decision, which may hinge on the feelings of all the millions of kids with gay parents, if justices’ questions are any guide.

We’ve got to do it to the children — er, uh…well-actually ‘for’ the children.

Thanks for listening – de Andréa

Copyright © 2013 by Bottom Line Publishing -  Permission to reprint in whole or in part is gladly granted, provided full credit is given.

No comments: